Questions to Ask Your Kids

If you could build anything near our home, what would you build?

Then ask: Who would get to use it, and what would the rules be?

If you were in charge of the whole family for a day, what would we do?

Then ask: What would you do when someone complained?

What would your perfect Saturday look like from morning to night?

Then ask: Which part could we really do this month?

If you could design a new holiday, what would it celebrate?

Then ask: What would people do on that day, and what would they eat?

If you could be any age for a week, which age would you pick?

Then ask: What do you think is hard about being that age?

If you wrote a book, what would it be about?

Then ask: Which character would be the hardest to write?

What game would you invent if you had a whole afternoon?

Then ask: How does someone win, and can everyone play?

If you could open a store, what would it sell?

Then ask: Who would come in, and what would they ask for that you do not have?

If you could learn any one thing overnight, what would it be?

Then ask: Would it mean as much as learning it the slow way?

What would you put in a time capsule for kids fifty years from now?

Then ask: What would they not understand without a note from you?

If you could change one thing about our town, what would it be?

Then ask: Who would be glad, and who would not be?

If animals could talk, which one would be the rudest?

Then ask: What would it say to us?

What would be the worst name for a pet?

Then ask: What would happen when you called it at the park?

If your shoes could talk, what would they say about today?

Then ask: Where would they refuse to go?

What is the silliest thing a grown-up has ever said to you?

Then ask: Did they mean it to be funny?

If vegetables had jobs, what job would broccoli have?

Then ask: Which vegetable would be its boss?

What would a dog write in its diary about our family?

Then ask: What would it get wrong about us?

What is the worst superpower you can think of?

Then ask: Is there any situation where it would save the day?

If you had to wear one costume for a whole year, which one would it be?

Then ask: When would it be the biggest problem?

What is a joke that only our family would get?

Then ask: How would you explain it to someone outside the family?

What sound should replace our doorbell?

Then ask: Who would be the most surprised by it?

What is the funniest thing that ever happened to you at school?

Then ask: Was it funny when it happened, or only later?

How do you know when something is true?

Then ask: What would make you change your mind about something you are sure of?

Is it ever okay to break a promise?

Then ask: What would have to happen for it to be the right thing?

What is the difference between knowing a lot and being wise?

Then ask: Do you know someone who is one and not the other?

What makes someone brave?

Then ask: Can you be brave and nervous at the same moment?

Is it worse to be treated unfairly or to watch it happen to someone else?

Then ask: What can a kid do about it?

What is something most people think that you are not sure about?

Then ask: What would help you make up your mind?

What makes a home feel like home?

Then ask: Could a different place ever feel that way? What would it need?

Is it possible to be happy and sad at once?

Then ask: When has that happened to you?

What do you think kids understand better than grown-ups?

Then ask: How could kids help grown-ups see it?

What is worth working hard for even if you might fail?

Then ask: How would you feel if you tried and it did not work?

If you could ask one question and get a true answer, what would you ask?

Then ask: What would you do with the answer?

What is something that is hard for you right now?

Then ask: What kind of help would you want, if any?

When do you feel most like yourself?

Then ask: What is going on around you when that happens?

What is something you used to be nervous about and are not anymore?

Then ask: What changed?

What do you like to do when you are alone?

Then ask: What is good about time by yourself?

What is one thing you wish grown-ups understood about being your age?

Then ask: How could you help them get it?

What makes you lose track of time?

Then ask: What does that tell you about what you like?

What do your friends come to you for?

Then ask: What do you go to them for?

What is a mistake you learned a lot from?

Then ask: Would you make it again to learn the same thing?

What is something you changed your mind about this year?

Then ask: What made you change it?

What do you want to be known for?

Then ask: What are you doing now that fits with that?

What is a question you wish someone would ask you?

Then ask: And what is your answer?

What is something I do that helps you?

Then ask: What is something I do that does not help, even when I mean well?

What do you think my job is like?

Then ask: Which part would you like, and which part would you hate?

Which rule in our house do you think is the least fair?

Then ask: How would you rewrite it so it works for everyone?

What is your earliest memory of our family?

Then ask: How sure are you that it happened the way you remember?

What should we do more of as a family?

Then ask: What would we have to do less of to fit it in?

When do you feel listened to at home?

Then ask: What does a person do that shows they are listening?

What do you think I was like at your age?

Then ask: What would the two of us have argued about?

What is something you would like to teach me?

Then ask: How patient would you be if I were slow to get it?

When we disagree, what do you wish I would do first?

Then ask: What could you do first?

Which family story do you like to hear again?

Then ask: What do you get from hearing it one more time?

What should we never change about our family?

Then ask: What would we lose if we did?